My Wedding Dress { An Eighth Letter To My Daughter }

Dear Baby Girl, almost another year has come and gone and here we are taking pictures of you in my wedding dress again. I know you don’t really love it and I don’t love that you don’t love it..and I’m debating if this is one of those things like piano lessons that I just make you do and you will appreciate it later, or if you will start to resent me for making you do it and need therapy sessions later on in life. I’m praying that it’s like piano lessons…although, if you really really don’t want to do this anymore, I will understand. Besides, I don’t need to take pictures of you in my wedding dress for me to write you a letter….although, it does make me more sentimental and I love to see how you’ve changed. I need to take more time daily to tell you the things I love about you and not just put them in a once a year blog post.

This time for pictures, I rolled up my dress and packed it along with my camera in a water proof bag and carried it into the wilderness of the Boundary Waters in Minnesota on our family trip….crazy I know, but it was worth it. This Minnesota trip has always been an adventure your dad and brothers went on every other year, but you had it in your mind you wanted to go and your dad didn’t hesitate to say yes. I wasn’t thrilled with the idea of going, but if my baby girl was going (along with my entire family)..this momma was going too (even if there was no pool, air conditioning, bathrooms…we will dive into all that later). If someone were to ask me if I had fun on this trip, I would probably say there were fun moments, but it was really more of an experience that I will never regret taking, especially because I got to see you thrive in your element. From the moment we entered the woods and lakes of the Boundary Waters, you turned into this wild outdoors girl. I mean, you have always loved to be outside and to get dirty, but this brought you to a whole new level of nature. We didn’t have most comforts of home, and to watch you adapt and flourish was so humbling and nurturing for my momma heart. You didn’t have a tv or cell service, and you didn’t miss it once because you were too busy catching frogs, swimming in the cold water, fishing, canoeing, making a bow, giving people tattoos from old charcoal in the fire pit, and just basking in the midday sun. You were so excited to eat the fish we caught for dinner and you gobbled it down like it was the best dish ever (and when you don’t have much food selection, trust me, it is the best thing ever! I won’t be able to look at an oatmeal packet for awhile!) You were always content and never complained. The only time things got a little rocky was when a big black BEAR decided to come to our campsite! I grabbed you and ran into the water, as if a bear can’t swim or run…but hey, now I know I don’t handle scary situations well and will be better prepared for the next one (hopefully there won’t ever be another bear situation..but you get my point). You wanted to leave that campsite, but we stuck it out another two nights before heading to our next site and you soon forgot that we weren’t the only creatures inhabiting the woods and were back to wading in the water and catching turtles in no time. Watching you in nature was so satisfying. It brought me closer to God..I know that may sound strange, but seeing you in His creation and enjoying His creation made me feel His presence more. It also made me realize we don’t need to fill our lives with things, with demanding schedules, with phones and computers (how quickly we go back to old habits when it comes to technology), and that reconnecting with nature and God is so very important. You didn’t want to come home, and although I really missed my bed and coffee, I longed for part of me to stay in the wilderness too. Being away from all the distractions and being able to be with you and love on you and see you shine is something I don’t want to forget. And although I don’t like the word “intentional” because it makes me feel like a failure when I don’t prioritize things in my life…I do need to be more intentional with the way I spend my time, especially when it comes to how I build into your ever growing character. Thank you for showing me how to dance on rocks, how to cast a fishing pole, how to dunk in the water, how to be dirty and not care (no lie, I didn’t mind not having a shower or a mirror, it was quite freeing..and so was peeing in the middle of the woods with bugs and nature surrounding me, lol). Thank you for being the wild, care free, kind and loving girl you are. You inspire me to be a better person. I will forever be your number one fan,

Love, Mom